A Warez Dictionary

Ware
An item offered for sale.
Hardware
Compensating for software.
Firmware
Compensating for hardware.
Software
Compensating for developers.
Freeware
Your problem now.
Payware
Your wallet's problem now.
Warez
Your antivirus' problem now.
Abandonware
Someone else's problem now.
Shareware
Your problem later.
Beerware/Cardware
Freeware with a twist.
Nagware/Guiltware
Freeware with a migraine.
Donationware/Careware
Freeware with a cause.
Patreonware
Freeware with a sugar daddy.
Trialware
Freeware. For now...
Crippleware
Fr__w_r_. Vowels extra.
Vapourware
404: No-ware to be found.
Alphaware/Betaware
Duck tape, hot snot, and baling wire.
Middleware
Fashion industry for real software.
Bloatware
The delusion that more is better.
Shovelware
All popular software given time.
Fritterware
Diabetes of the computer.
Camelware
Horseware designed by committee.
Crapware
See software.
Malware
Technology is neutral. /s
Nannyware
The high tech way to abuse a partner.
Censorware
What you don't know can't hurt me.
Grayware
Modern™ software development.
Adware
Buy. Consume. Procreate. Obey.
Spyware
I'm watching you fap.
Crimeware
Avoid targets with extradition treaties.
Scareware
You're "infected", send 1 BTC to fix.
Ransomware
You're encrypted, send 1 BTC to fix.
Diceware
Just use a password manager, nerd.
Treeware
Books.
Wetware/Meatware/Liveware
Soylent Green.
Delaware
1.6 million corporations and counting.
Houseware
Designed to fill one's house.
Cookware
For making.
Holloware
For serving.
Flatware
For eating.
Tupperware
For saving.
Silverware
For guests.